Worry and the Future Part 1

I have been thinking about worry, and what I can do to control it's impact on my everyday life. Obviously as a Christian I am not suppose to worry because God has promised to care for me, but like a child, I sometimes wonder if my Heavenly Father really understands how I feel and what I need. This doubt leads to poor choices, poor health, and a poor spiritual life.

The thought occurred to me that this is why so many of us want to know the future and what it holds for us and those we love. Deep down we believe that God either does not understand or is unavailable, so we strive for what by our very nature we can never have because we are ultimately powerless (blessed are the poor in spirit).

The future is not ours to fully possess. We can plan, estimate, and even gamble, but we can never really know the future. Strangely on a purely logical level this has given me some comfort. If being human means limited knowledge of the future, then to search for what is devoid by my human nature appears to be a self contradiction, and a dissatisfaction with my very being. Worry becomes not just a spiritual problem, but an existential one. To worry is to wrestle against our humanity, and that may be why it can be so detrimental.

TOTT